Hey, Brooklyn. Ride this train with me right into a weekend filled with surprises and promises and bad decisions and dirty little secrets. Stop waiting around. No need to keep looking down that dark tunnel and convincing yourself you see a light reflecting off of all the grime. Your weekend is here, baby.
All aboard.
THURSDAY
Dirty Thursday New Wave Night at House of Yes in Bushwick
Let that wave of stress that’s been chasing you all week wash right over you tonight and let a new wave set in and crash into you at House of Yes. It’s New Wave night for Dirty Thursday, so get dirty then dance yrself clean to tracks from Joy Division, Depeche Mode, The Cure, New Order, and everyone else who was making music back when it was good. (haha jk it’s still good man. If you disagree, listen better.) Free all night, plus free drinks for really good costumes. Yeah. Get-up to get down. (get it?) Info here, 10pm-4am. At 2 Wyckoff Ave where the magic happens.
El Jefe’s Nachoria Pop-Up at the Diamond, Greenpoint.
It’s Thursday and that means everyone’s favorite bar in Greenpoint (so not biased) will be hosting another international pop-up dinner. This week they welcome back the boss, El Jefe’s Nachoria who will be making those naughty little flame-torched nachos right before your eyes. Why flame-scorched nachos? No more sog, baby. And because blow torches are so much cooler than ovens. Everyone knows that. An expanded selection means even more chances to find a perfect pairing with Diamond Dave’s carefully curated drafts AND liquors. Info here, dinner starts at 7pm, beers flow until 2. Makeout sessions in the gondola go on all night. 43 franklin st.
FRIDAY
Beer Mansion at the Weylin in Williamsburg
There are a lot of bullshit beer events in this town. This is not one of them. How do I know? Because the Brooklyn Brewery is curating it and doing it in style. What not to expect: douchebags, folding tables, tiny little tastings under fluorescent lights. What to expect: 4 different parties, 7 breweries, live bands all day and lots of meatballs. Yep. It’s all happening at the Weylan, which will be transformed into a speakeasy, an arcade, a variety show and a bazaar, which will only get weirder the more beers you drink, from the Brooklyn Brewery, Transmitter Brewery, Fifth Hammer, and Mikkeller (from Austria, now you can meet them with the Mets!), and more. Food from the Meatball Shop. Pig Beach, El Atorado and still more. Tickets start at $65. More info here, 6-10pm both Friday AND Saturday, day and night shifts. It’s happening at the Weylin, which, you know, is that AMAZING building across from Baby’s All Right that you’ve always wanted to go in. Go. Get in there. Drink some beers. 173 Broadway Ave.
Friday the 13th Flash Tattoo Special at Abuela’s in Bushwick
Friday the 13th makes us all want to do something a little dangerous. Make some bad decisions. Test our luck. Lie cheat steal. You know the feeling, that relentless craving for mischief. How about getting a completely random tattoo? Yep. Perfect. Give it to me. Friday the 13th tattoo special at Abuela’s in Bushwick. $20 cash, tip included, gets you one of 20 Friday the 13t themed tattoos. This is a very popular event, so come early. all info here, 10am-midnight, 608 Myrtle Ave.
Free Friday: Poetic Brooklyn at the Brooklyn Historical Society in Dumbo
Poetry Month, poem readings at Brooklyn Historical Society, plus beer!
Poetry is not dead. It’s alive and breathing and beating and thriving and to make it official, it has a month. Just as social media and Rumi would want it. Embrace this beautiful literary art and let the magic into your soul this Friday at the Brooklyn Historical Society. They invite poets of all kinds to come and share aloud and to imbibe a bit with Brooklyn beers to make it all flow out smoothly. This event is free to watch and to share, don’t be shy. Info here, 5-9pm, 128 Pierrepont St.
Cacao Ceremony and Reiki Experience at Anima Mundi Apothecary in Greenpoint
Do something good for your heart, your body, your mind this Friday and join in this ceremony of love at Anima Mundi Apothecary. Led by Reiki master Kelly Keefe, experience this guided meditation and hands-on healing workshop complete with sacred cacao medicine. A $40 donation is suggested, don’t be an asshole. Info here, 7-9pm, 35 Noble St. #reikireikimamalikey
SATURDAY
The Cityfox Experience at the Avant Gardner in Bushwick
Oh my god, it’s a mirage! No, no… the amazing indoor space at Brooklyn Mirage. Yeah. As in the coolest fucking nightclub in Brooklyn is now letting you in. Letting you make things happen behind closed doors, under one roof. Make some dirty little secrets. Dance yrself clean, all fucking night. The Cityfox Experience is bringing Âme DJ, Tiga, Mathias Kaden, Oliver Schories Live & More to keep you moving and grooving and shaking and making love all night. Tickets, $65 are worth every penny. Get yours here now, they will sell out. 10pm-430am, 140 Stewart Ave.
Dream Machine Interactive Experience in Williamsburg
We can all say we’re living the dream, right? That life that everyone dreams of, in New York City! The place where dreams come true! I mean, if those dreams are paying way too much for a shitty basement apartment and suffering through daily MTA delays (delailys?) and lowering our self-esteem with the swipey dating machine that infests our town. Yeah. The fucking dream. Well leave all of that behind this weekend at the dream machine, a place built from imagination and immerse yourself in this interactive experience that has manifested all of your good dreams. The ones that keep you going. So in other words, George Clooney is going to be there, naked. And calling my name. Tickets, $38 available here. It’s the second weekend so get there quick before all the dreams get sullied by tourists and “influencers”. 10am-10pm, 93 N 9th St.
Holi In The City on a Rooftop in Manhattan
Hey New York. We know what you want. You want to brighten up that instagram this weekend while pretending to take part in a cultural celebration and feel like you’re not just there to get drunk and take photos and also, of course, you need brunch, that thing we know of as “lunch” during the weekdays. If you didn’t catch on yet, this is the event you shouldn’t go to this weekend. Because they so desperately need to capitalize on everything that could have some sort of substance to it and put it on a rooftop in Manhattan and I’m really not as mad as I sound, but still. You almost had a reason to cross the river this weekend. Good news, you don’t anymore. And you save $35. Info here if you must. That is all.
Festival of Colors: Holi NYC in Bushwick
Instead, head to a more colorful, less lame, and way way better celebration of color on this side of the river. A celebration of color, of music, of art, of light and not brunch. Ever. $25 gets you into this spring arts and music festival and will have you taking part of this cultural ritual and seasonal rejuvenation in a much better way. Why is it better? Because it’s in Brooklyn. Tickets, $25 available here. 1-7:30pm. 485 Johnson Ave.
Rinsed + Bushwick A/V Afterhours Party in Bushwick
I never, ever advise doing this. That little fire in you that seems to burn brighter as you exit the club, heating you up and having you searching with a fever for the next place, the next party, the next bass-bumping and crowd-loving dance floor… ignore it. But IF you can’t, unfortunately your girl knows all of the after-hours parties in Brooklyn. No, not the best ones. None of these are good. But if you must partake, head to this one, from our friends at Rinsed. Tickets, $20 available here and at the door for a bit more. 4am-dead. 299 Vandervoort Ave.
SUNDAY
Pretty Zen Sip + Sign with Jules Aron at Anima Mundi Apothecary in Greenpoint
Sometimes I feel bad about my drinking habits (read: waking up at noon to an alarm I set at 6am with a never-ending to-do list and impenetrable headache). Other times, I feel really fucking good about such habits (read: approximately 9 hours before I feel bad). This Sunday find out how to feel good about them all the time with Jules Aron, author of Zen And Tonics. She’ll be doing a sip and sign and teaching you all about her beauty elixirs. Feel better, look better, get glowing, get going. This event is free. Info here, 11am (so in other words, if you make it here you probably already know how to not drink toxic things). 35 Noble St.
Holes with a Peach Daquiri at Videology in Williamsburg
Were there some holes in your weekend? Here’s your chance to fill them in with popcoorn and sweet peach daquiris and also a really great film at Videology. Don’t sit at home and Netflix, you anxious and hungover little Brooklynite. Go here. Make friends. Chase that hangover into Monday, where everything will suck anyway. Tickets, $25 include on daq and are available right here. Show starts at 5:45pm. 308 Bedford Ave.
See you out there, Brooklyn.
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