Hey Brooklyn, it’s mid-June. Let’s check in here. How sun-burnt is your skin? How many hot dogs have you eaten? How many beach trips have you taken? How many times have you lied to your boss and played hooky?
How have you embraced this wondrous season in our fair city thus far?
Let me help you dive in. I’ve lassoed up all the best events in the city. SPF not required.
THURSDAY
Hot Dog Boyfriend at the Diamond in Greenpoint
Did you know the FDA recommends you only eat two hot dogs a year? Did you also know that the FDA has zero friends, hates fun, can’t fucking chill and doesn’t take notice of a good pair of buns and also never gets laid? Don’t be like the FDA. Eat hot dogs with reckless abandon. And start tonight with Hot Dog Boyfriend at the Diamond. Because hot dogs pair perfectly with the selection of cold draft beers you’ve likely never heard of. Grill heats up at 7pm, drinks go on all night. Info here, 43 Franklin St. Meet me in the gondola where we can share weiners and secrets. #weinersandsecrets
Shakespeare in the Park Presents Othello, in Central Park
Your reason to cross the river at least once this month. Go to Shakespeare in the Park. One of the most magical and creatively alive happenings in the city, and best of all, it’s FREE. If you haven’t been, you’ll need to get to Central Park early. Like, 8am early. Bring snacks and coffee and a blanket. Camp out, sit in, make friends. They start giving out tickets at noon so settle in. Collect only up to two tickets per person. Spend the rest of the day at any number of museums, come back for the performance. Be moved. Info here. Oh, yeah… if you’re rich you can just buy a ticket. But… #eattherich
THE WORLD CUP BEGINS
There is nothing better than the spirit, the passion, and the energy surrounding the world cup. Come watch and celebrate as the world’s sport begins what will be a month of mashups and meet ups, turnovers and undertakings, mishaps and jockstraps (…or are there?). And a hell of a lot of beers consumed all over the world. Check out my guide on all the best places to watch the World Cup in Brooklyn. Catch the spirit, baby.
FRIDAY
La Salumina Pop-Up at the Gatehouses in the Brooklyn Navy Yard
Find a cure for common happy hour with this meat-up. Puns. I love puns. And also cured meat. La Salumina has been slaying it and sheltering it here in Brooklyn and they’ll be bringing it to you at The Gatehouses (which, of course, you’ve heard of already) this Friday night. So come, drink whiskey, eat porchetta, sit outside, stay awhile. It’s all going down in the historic tourettes godammit! turrets at the entrance to the Navy Yard. Come. Free to attend, info here. 4-10pm at 299 Sands St.
And while you’re in the Navy Yard, how does live music within a winery atop a warehouse at sunset in Brooklyn sound? Damn near perfect.
Keep reading.
The Bergamot at Rooftop Reds in the Navy Yard
Come see the Bergamot seduce you with their indie-folk tunes while sipping on some hyper-local wines and watching the sunset over our fair land. Be whole. Feel good. Get tipsy. Make bad decisions and feel good about them. Tickets, $25, include a glass of wine and are available right here, right now. 7-10pm. 299 Sands St, Bldg 275
Bike Ride to Clearwater, a Music and Environmental Festival on the Hudson
Not for the abundantly hungover or the too-week-at-heart, this 5-hour bike ride will bring you along the most paved off-road trail outside of the city, towards Clearwater Fest, a music and environmental festival that you want to be a part of. The organized ride leaves at 10am from Chelsea Pier. Info here. Ride or die.
Spain vs Portugal at Banter Bar in Williamsburg
There are tons of places to watch this epic matchup between most of Real Madrid’s team and the guy who thinks he is Real Madrid’s entire team, but my pick is Banter Bar in Williamsburg. This classic futbol pub is always teeming with fans, and they’ll have both Superbock AND Mahou on tap. And chorizo sausages for $6. And I’m going to be there, and I’m bringing my face paints. Kickoff is at 2pm. Info here. 132 Havemeyer St.
SATURDAY
The 38th Annual Mermaid Parade in Coney Island
A celebration of the diversity, creativity, and audacity of this amazing city. It’s the 38th annual Mermaid Parade at (where else?) Coney Island. Go dressed in your best undersea getup (or however you wish to interpret it) and dive in to this wonderfully imaginative event. Trust me, if you think you’ve seen some wild things in this city, go to this event. I don’t know where these people come from or where the hell they shop, but I love every minute of it. Don’t hold back, now’s not the time. Info here. 1-4:40pm.
Jazz Age Lawn Party on Governor’s Island
The jazz age lawn party. The (2) weekends a year that people who own seersucker suits get to feel kind of cool, when everyone pretends alcohol is illegal, and when everyone sweats off their bold flapper makeup while waiting on the pier together, downing the rose they intended to last the entire day and not thinking for a moment that yes, everyone will be trying to get off the island at the exact same time. Yes, yes it’s the Jazz Age Lawn Party and, it’s… it’s fun. It is. If you haven’t been, you should go. And that’s that. Tickets are $0-5,000 so decide where you fall on that scale. Info here. Saturday and Sunday.
Atlantis: The Mermaid Parade After Party at House of Yes in Bushwick
Happily collecting all of the freaky spillover from the Mermaid Parade is our beloved house of love, house of life, house of literally anything goes here. Especially if it goes down under. Come in your wildest undersea interpretations. When in doubt, add more glitter. Tickets, $30 available here. Costumes required. 10pm-4am. 2 Wyckoff Ave.
FYI, you cannot wear your sweaty jazz age lawn outfits to this event. Nor will you likely enjoy it, you little seersucker. Go back to Murray Hill. (that was harsh) (i don’t care)
Getaway Day Party at Bar Uni in Greenpoint
The oversized day party is something to behold, however sometimes boundless outdoor-warehouse events can somehow seem too big, too overdone, too nerve-wracking to enjoy. Tighten up the scene and get away from the expansive day party by slipping into the backyard of a charming Japanese cocktail bar this Saturday. Bar Uni hosts the Getaway Day Party in their enchanting little garden. DJs will be sampling tribalhouse and afrobeats all day, and you’ll be sampling Bar Uni’s new dry-aged cheeseburger. And if you still manage to lose your friends at this one… well… I don’t know, maybe you should go home. Free to attend, 1-8pm, info here. 674 Manhattan ave.
SUNDAY
Brazilmania World Cup “Kick Off” at House of Yes in Bushwick
If you’re reading this, you missed the official kickoff this morning. But that’s ok. House of Yes will make you feel like you arrived just in time for the party this Sunday with their all-day Brazilmania celebration. Come see Brazil battle Switzerland on two huge screens with a Brazilian BBQ, all the caipirinhas you can drink, live music by the Brazilian Brothers Band during halftime and post-game, Sambas, Mambas, Mambos. Come celebrate and feel alive and forget about Monday. It’s the fucking World Cup. Monday is no longer relevant. Event is free, noon-8pm. Info here.
Down To Earth Farmers Market at McGolrick Park in Greenpoint
Greenpoint is adorable. And not just because of its charming bars and restaurants or the fact that a local bird has his own Instagram account, but because it truly feels like a small town. Case in point: Big news last week, a petition to move the McGolrick Farmers Market back to the center of the park. Why was it pushed aside?! No one knows, but sign this! Now, it’s been re-placed to the center. My theory? Some dude arrived early for the first time and set up his booth on the edge. That was it. Let’s celebrate it’s return to the center this weekend. Go, get your produce. Feel centered. Info here. 10am-4pm, Mcgolrick Park.
Egg Rolls, Egg Creams, and Empanadas Festival in the Lower East Side of Manhattan
Your #reasontocrosstheriverthisweekend is a most unlikely combination for a food fest. However, shouldn’t we be combining our food festivals into one big beautiful cultural mix instead of sequestering them? This egg rolls, egg creams, and empanadas festival celebrates Jewish, Chinese and Puerto Rican tastes, traditions, sights and sounds in the cultural epicenter of it all, the lower east side. Come and embrace the beautiful truth that there’s more that unites us than divides us, especially when it comes to eggs. or, like, short “e” sounds at the beginning of the names of foods. Just go man, it’s free to attend, all info here, noon-4pm at the Museum at Eldridge st, 12 Eldridge St.
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