Hey Brooklyn. Looking for that localized experience, even if you’ve lived here for years? Yeah well, this city has a funny hesitance when accepting people. Let me put you in the places and with the people who will make you feel like you belong here. Let me put you on the right track. Your weekend guide pulls out all the stops and is ready to take you for a wild ride. So choose your path wisely. Start by scrolling down. I’ve made plans for you.
Things to do in Brooklyn on Thursday
MUNCHIES Guide to Dinner at Archestratus in Greenpoint
If you aren’t already relying on MUNCHIES to help you look and cook better in the kitchen, then you owe it to yourself and whomever you’re feeding to just bookmark this page right now. And also, come to this event at Archestratus to meet the team and learn their tips and tricks, and then eat those tips and tricks, this Thursday night. They’ll be serving up some chips and onion dip (not from the little packet… forget about the packet, ok? It’s over for you and the packet.), pimento cheese arancini balls (where my southerners at!) and a damn good chocolate cake. Learn from the best, eat with the best. Tickets here. 6:30-8:30pm, 160 Huron St.
It’s Beaujolais Day! Worldwide.
Beaujolais day is one of my very favorite reasons to get drunk on red wine and do french things. If you don’t know the story behind this oh-so-charming tradition, you can read about it here. Then put on your berets (don’t worry, we all look kind of dumb in them), run down the street with a baguette, rent a bichon fris for the day, find the last of the foie gras in the city (for real, you know someone still has some) and drink this year’s new vintage. It’s young and spritely and it’s been waiting for you like that Tinder date you always dreamed of. I’ll be dining at Juliette in Williamsburg and picking up a few bottles from Spirit Animal. Join me! (berets required. no exceptions.)
Magic Mike Entirely From Memory at Littlefield in Gowanus
How much do you remember from Magic Mike? Because I remember EVERYTHING. And sometimes I replay it over again in my head before I go to sleep, or like when I’m on the train, or just feeling a little lonely. So FYI Ten Bones Theatre, I’d be GREAT at this. However, they’ll challenge a troop of 8 very not-sober performers to reenact the magic on stage at Littlefield this Thursday and you need to be there. Because we all owe it to Channing Tatum to know that we can’t ever forget him, just the way he was then. Tickets here. Doors at 7:30, show at 8pm. 635 Sackett St.
yasiin bey: Negus, Live at the Brooklyn Museum in Prospect Heights
How cool will you feel if you respond to your friends’ group text of “hey anything cool happening tonight” with “I was thinking about hitting up this one-night only immersive performance and dance party after-hours at the Brooklyn Museum in celebration of the new opening for their Arts of Asia exhibit but I guess that’s pretty much it.” You can do that. I just wrote the text for you. All you have to do is copy/paste, impress your friends, buy tickets here, and go. You’re welcome. 200 Eastern Pkwy.
Things to do in Brooklyn on Friday
Art Pop at House of Yes in Bushwick
There’s a little Rainbow Bright in all of us. Let her loose this Friday night at House of Yes for their Art Pop party. They welcome Haute to Death and House darling Justin Strauss in all of their vibrant, colorful glory to help you combat the greyish grips of Winter. So come. Dress up. Feel alive. Be alive. Dance all night. You can do it all free, in costume, before 11pm. Details and tickets here. 10pm-4am, 2 Wyckoff Ave.
Super Disco at Avant Gardner in Bushwick
Disco isn’t dead and neither am I and neither are you. So let’s celebrate in the best way we know how and at the absolute best venue we could ever imagine. It’s Super Disco at Avant Gardner, and that means an all-night dance party with the best DJs this city can entice to visit (what, like it’s hard?) and all of your best friends and future lovers tearing it up on the dance floor. This will be the best dance party of the weekend. Get tickets here now. 10pm-4am, 140 Stewart Ave.
Fornino at The Springs in Greenpoint
We all have trouble letting go of our summer romances. And for me and The Springs? Well, it’s been tough. How can I appreciate my frozen Aperol Spritz without lounging outside on my selected rainbow open-air cabana? I can appreciate it all with a little help from my friends, at Fornino. They’ll be teaming up to help winterize The Springs and to help us all come around to our wintery selves. So go, get a cocktail. Get a pizza. Get a little loose and then tighten it all up with a few bites of pizza and all your best dance moves. Because there’s no need to forget your summer romances. Just allow them to evolve a bit in your heart. There’s some info here. 224 Franklin St.
Things to do in Brooklyn on Saturday
Nutcracker Rouge by Company XIV in Bushwick
Yes, there is such a thing as celebrating the holidays way, way too early (hello, Big D on Manhattan Ave…) but stripping down all of the bullshit to celebrate a holiday tradition with some of the absolute best talent in the city is always right on time. Company XIV brings back their absolutely unbelievable version of the Nutcracker started last weekend and trust me when I tell you it’s the most amazing thing I’ve ever seen in this city. And I don’t say that lightly. Get your tickets here now. 383 Troutman St.
Just Go to the Brooklyn Bazaar in Greenpoint
The Brooklyn Bazaar is CLOSING at the end of this month and it breaks my heart. Let’s all go and make memories and get lost and find each other in this multi-level adult playground. And then let’s take shots and forget we sung karaoke until we hear We Built This City on the radio at Cafe Grumpy the next day. Oof. Check their calendar here and get your ass there before it’s too late.
Houe of NO at House of Yes in Bushwick
No phones
No photos
No bullshit
No bad attitudes
No nonsense
No (such thing as) bad dancing
Welcome to our House of No – a hedonistic musical playground designed to inspire you to get of your phone, get in the groove, feel the vibrations of sound, light, and human connection. Jack your body and embrace the shapes of the darkness. Lose yourself in powerful pulsating rhythms of our friends from The Bunker NY. Tickets here. Don’t be scared. 10pm-4am. 2 Wyckoff Ave.
Female Joker at Michael Alan’s Studio in Bushwick
There is no one else I would trust to (already!) reinterpret The Joker in an intense female roll but Jadda Cat and the relentless Michael Alan within their intimate yet profound studio in Bushwick. They’ll bring to you The Female Joker, a live performance art piece that you shouldn’t miss this Saturday night. Because these two have been keeping edgy, punk-style art happening in Bushwick somehow despite oncoming gentrification or what they refer to as “fancy art ass-kissing”. Heard. Saturday night will be a 4-hour act where Jadda will take performance art into a deep trance-like level, as if you’re watching a very vivid dream. See it live buy RSVPing right here. Or tune in from home, along with a donation. Keep this type of art alive. It keeps us all alive.
Indoor Smorgasburg + Brooklyn Flea at 25 Kent Ave in Williamsburg
Oh, thank you Smorgasburg, for helping us all forget that Summer is over and we are nearly forced into a weird urban hybernation, no longer able to carelessly wander among food booths and weave around people instagramming pineapples against the Manhattan skyline, For real, thank you, for taking it indoors so we can all graze around like little urban cattle and discover all of the wonderful flavors our beloved borough has to offer. Come to indoor Smorgasburg along with the Brooklyn Flea, every Saturday and Sunday, all winter long. Info here. 25 Kent Ave.
Vegan Wing Eating Competition at The Gradient in Bushwick
Oh now this is just too funny. If you’ve ever had a vegan iteration of any meat product, it requires virtually no tooth-work. So this, a boneless, toothless, heartless eating competition for people who are so overly conscious about their food choices that they no longer eat meat, eggs, cheese, or fucking Spanish jamon. So, let’s cheer them on while they overly stuff their faces with their smart food choices? I don’t know what to think. But what I do know is that I love being at The Gradient, and I won’t think twice for ordering a beer and a fried real chicken sandwich, even while sauce-covered competitive vegan eaters sneer at me. The competition starts at 7pm. Info here. 17 Wyckoff Ave.
Nightwav Synth Party at St. Vitus
The monthly answer to all of our “I’m really sick of these lame dance parties” woes is happening this Saturday night. So stop bitching. Stop losing all your friends at massive rave parties, or even at intimate rave parties where you just did too many drugs. Come to this, bring your friends, find new friends, and dance all night to the likes of Depeche Mode, The Clash, Kavinsky, and the theme song from Stranger Things. Go, get deep. Get dark. Grab a drink from me beforehand at Le Fanfare. Free with an RSVP right here. 11pm-4am. 1120 Manhattan Ave.
Things to do in Brooklyn on Sunday
Stay tuned!!
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